The Pros and Cons Of Adulting Post Children

Being an adult is strange. You oftentimes feel like a kid, trapped in a larger, more mature body. Most days you are required to adult. And to be adulty by doing adult things. It’s referred to as ADULTING.

Most of the time when an adult is required, I find myself looking to see if there’s another grown person hanging around. Like, someone who seems more capable. Unfortunately, a lot of the time it falls on me. I am THE adult in charge.

Buzzkill.

I don’t like labels. I am uncomfortable with terms like ADULT. I also feel weird calling myself a BLOGGER. Sure I have a blog. And I write posts for the blog. But the term blogger just seems so presumptuous.

I enjoy running. At one point I was running 30 miles per week. But the term RUNNER seems so bold.

Another label that I find odd is MOTHER. Let’s be real. I am barely getting by at this parenting gig. How in the world do four people call ME Mother? They stare at me with those inquisitive eyes, searching for answers. I spout off some adult sounding stuff and they take it as Bible. What I say goes. Because I am an adult and therefore must know what I am talking about.

How long before they see straight through the charade? I am winging this thing. And I am winging it, hard.

I can run from it all I want but there is no getting around the fact that I am an adult. I have wrinkles, a mortgage and a pair of loafers. That’s pretty dang grown.

But I have come to understand that there are both advantages and disadvantages to being an adult. And even a parent. Let’s talk about some right now.

Pro: You no longer have to ask your parents if you can go out and socialize.
Con: You do however have to ask your baby sitter.

Pro: You can watch whatever you want on TV. You even get to hold the remote.
Con: By the time your kids go to sleep, you are too tired for TV. And you wake up at 1 AM on the couch, still clutching the remote. You don’t even remember sitting down.

Pro: No one can make you to eat your vegetables. You are in charge.
Con: You have to make other people eat their vegetables. They won’t. They are in charge.

Pro: You can afford fancier cars.
Con: Your kids slowly destroy your fancier cars. One knob,arm rest and lever at a time.

Pro: You get to pick out your own clothes and dress how YOU want to dress.
Con: Anything you put on will eventually be covered in peanut butter and snot.

Pro: You have a job and you don’t have to beg your parents for money.
Con: You have a job.

Pro: You now have money that affords you freedom to do the things that you want to do.
Con: Your kid needs braces. And she needs you to take her to the appointment. She don’t have money OR freedom.

Pro: You can read the books that you want to read and not what you are told to read in school.
Con: You read Cat In The Hat seven times until you pass out on your child’s bed.

Pro: You no longer have to do math homework.
Con: Yes you do. Except they don’t do it like you used to and if you try to Google “How to do fourth grade math” your kid looks at you all judgy.

Pro: You no longer have a curfew.
Con: You do your best to be home and in your sweatpants by 6 PM.

Well, I could go on and on but you get my point.

I heard a young woman say just yesterday, that she had recently made an effort to be more “adult-like” in her life. She used the example of splurging on more expensive wine choices. Because life is too short to waste time on bad wine.

I didn’t have the heart to tell her about the early nights and box wines that I see in her ADULTIER future.

Am I right?

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